Apathy vs the will to Blog

Have you ever felt so out of touch with your own surroundings that everything feels a bit unreal? Felt like time is moving along at a snail's pace or that you're looking in on your own life from outside a window?

That's kind of how I've been feeling these past couple of weeks. Ever since I got back from New Zealand it's been hard to fit myself back into my old life. Right... old as in 4 months old! Funny how being gone for 4-5 intense months can make coming back to where things are calm and not much is going on (personally or professionally) seem a bit scary, and depressing! How can things be the same when you've done so much??? Argh!!! Anyhow, it's resulted in a sense of apathy that I'm having trouble shaking... like someone hit the "pause" button on me and I'm waiting for something else to come by and knock me into "play" mode. Not good.

Therein lies the excuse for the absentee blogger... I've got blogging ideas popping into my head every now and again, but when I get home I can't be bother to sit down to the computer and develop them! And then when some time has passed I get frustrated with myself for having forgotten what seemed like some damn good ideas at the time. Part of me is hung up by the backlog of posts that are semi-prepared from the trip (for CrisCrossing the Globe) and are there in limbo, waiting for me to finish up with them... Kind of a "deal with the stuff pending before you get into the new", and I end up in a vicious circle where nothing gets done!

So I'm breaking the circle by just starting up with some random blogging again, and I'll slowly release posts on New Zealand over on the other blog, just back-dating them to when they were supposed to be published (I wonder how that will appear in people's readers...). Ditto with the Project 365 photos. I'm not going to dump them all on you in one massive month's-worth chunk, but perhaps 5 at a time. I actually forgot a couple days... damn! Took me a while to remember my cellphone has a camera so I don't need to be carrying around my DSLR just to get a daily photo! I figured it wouldn't be as fun a project once life had gotten back to "normal", and indeed, I quite forgot about it a couple of days! :o( The photos I have taken might not be too interesting because they're frequently last minute "oh my! I haven't taken the 365 photo yet today!". I'm going to have to try and make mundane things seem interesting through the camera lens, should be an interesting challenge! Which isn't to say I'm going to give up on random shots with my cellphone. ;o)